Week 23 - Going for 10%

Well, I'm at the end of week 23 and I've lost 12.7 kg so far. I guess an average of half a kg a week. Not bad, but I can do better. No, no, no, I'm not putting myself down and I know I've done well but I can lose weight better than this. I've done it before.

I'd like to lose on average a kg a week. I'm not drinking enough water. I'm probably having too many snacks for my points rather than real food. But in general I've improved my habits and lifestyle a hell of a lot.

I no longer eat donuts. I no longer eat hot chips. I no longer have milk shakes. I exercise. I no longer drink soft drink. I track every single thing that passes my lips. I even tracked Christmas Day. So things have changed.

I went to the movies with some friends today, to the 'babes in arms' session of Confessions of a Shopaholic. We took our babies as it's a special session for mums. The movie was about a shopaholic obviously and it was quite sad at times to see her out of control. One of my friends commented after the movie that she was like her, only addicted to food. And I realized that's me as well, but I'm slowly dealing with that. When you stop eating to cover your feelings, the feelings come out and it can feel so raw. Suddenly you have to feel everything! And deal with everything...

Like thinking about returning to work in July four days a week, and having to put my baby boy into child care. I love him so much it hurts at times. He's my bub. He grew inside me for nine months and his heart beats right along with mine. And when he's not with me for one reason or another, I feel like I've left my right arm at home. Thinking about having to leave him to work makes me churn inside. It's these types of things that I worry about, and have to stop myself from eating when I worry. As my leader once said 'there is no answer in food'.

This week I have 100 g to lose to get my ten percent. My reward for myself will be getting my hair done next Friday. Will I do it? I'm not sure. I've gone a bit over my points this week though I've done my best to balance it out. I've also had to cut some points midweek due to ceasing to breastfeed altogether in the middle of the week. It has thrown me a bit. And I haven't exercised as much as usual. But I'm optimistic I may still have a loss. Anyway, I will post tomorrow and record how I've gone.

Wish me luck!